Adventures In France #1: Life Abroad Will Be Miserable Unless You Do This One Thing
Moving abroad sounds exciting, fun and adventurous but unless you do certain things to prepare, your dream life abroad can turn into a nightmare.
This is the first installment of a series called “Adventures In France”. Find out what it’s like for a family of five to take a break from life and the rat-race and move abroad -to France as temporary expats.
Whether you’re an arm chair traveler who is curious about life abroad or you’re thinking about taking a career break, sabbatical or job abroad, you’ll find this series both interesting and informative. Think of it as an educational journey / reality travel series. Be sure to sign up for email updates and never miss an issue.
Don’t be miserable after you move abroad
Traveling and moving to a new country with new customs, food, a different language can be very traumatic. It can cause severe culture shock which is one of the biggest problems that people encounter when they move abroad.
If you’ve never experienced culture shock let me explain.
CULTURE SHOCK:
Imagine arriving in a place where you can’t communicate, you can’t tell anyone what you want and the customs are so foreign that you can’t make heads or tail of any situation. You don’t recognize a lot of the food and you don’t even know how to cash a check. Doing simple things stresses you out and takes a lot of effort. So much so that you feel exhausted at doing the simplest of things.
Culture shock can make you feel isolated, depressed and make you curse the day you decided to move abroad. It can turn an otherwise wonderful adventurous experience into a depressing nightmare.
How To Avoid Culture Shock
You can minimize and avoid culture shock all together by learning about your destinations people, it’s customs, even it’s history. The single biggest thing you can do however, to avoid culture shock and make your time abroad more enjoyable is learn the language BEFORE YOU LEAVE YOUR HOME COUNTRY.
I can’t stress this enough. Knowing just some basic phrases and some vocabulary can help you hit the ground running as soon as you arrive in your new country.You will be able to do simple things like ask for directions, ask where the bathroom is, where the nearest atm is etc.
The Kids:
If you have kids, it’s doubly important to prepare their minds for what life might be like especially if they are older. Younger kids seem to be able to adapt more easily. This may be due to the fact that younger children are inherently more creative and more open to new experiences than older kids and adults.
As we get older, we tend to lose our creativity and close our minds to change and new experiences. It’s very important to be open to new experiences to make the most of your time abroad otherwise, it will not be fun for you AT ALL!
Did you know that there was a study conducted which showed that living abroad can actually increase your creativity?
About France
I don’t want you to experience culture shock so i’m going to give you a very high level overview of the country we are living in now- France. The research you do for the country you plan to move to will be very similar but much more detailed.
Geography and History
France is a very popular tourist destination. In fact, more tourists visit France than any other country in the WORLD! Here are some other interesting facts.
- France is in Europe DUH!!.
- Paris is the capital of France.
- France is part of the EU, European Union which consists of twenty seven countries as of (2012). (Eu has it’s own flag, see photo left.
- The Atlantic and Mediterranean Ocean border metropolitan France.
- 8 countries border metropolitan France. They are 1-Belgium, 2- Luxemburg, 3- Germany, 4- Switzerland, 5- Italy, 6- Spain, 7- Monaco and a little country called 8- Andorra.
- France is divided into 27 Regions. Regions are the equivalent to Canadian Provinces and US States
- Then further divided into 101 Departments which is similar to counties . We live in Marseille which is in the region Provence-Alpes-Côte d’Azur, Department Bouches-du-Rhone.
- Size wise, France is about 211,000 square miles. In comparison, Texas is is about 269,000 square miles and Manitoba is 250,116 square miles.
Language: Facts & Benefits of Speaking French
As i said earlier, If you plan to move to a country where they speak another language, start learning that language as soon as possible. It will make your transition much easier.
Here are some interesting facts and benefits about the French language. French is not only a beautiful language but speaking French has it’s benefits.
- French and English are the only two global languages. French is one of the few foreign language that can be useful throughout the world as well as in the United States.
- French as a foreign language is the second most frequently taught language in the world after English.
- French used to be the language of the nobility and diplomacy all across Europe until English replaced it in the mid-20th century.
- French was the official language of England for over 300 years (from 1066 until the early 15th century).
- 28 countries have French as an official language but not all of them ONLY speak French. For example, Quebec where my family is from is mostly French speaking but the rest of Canada is English. The same is true in many other European countries.
- French, along with English, is the official working language of the United Nations, UNESCO and NATO
There are many ways you can learn french. Take a class. Buy software and teach yourself. There are even video games that can teach you how to speak a new language. In my opinion, audio and or video products are best in terms of helping your pronunciation.
At the very minimum, get yourself a dictionary and a Visual Dictionary which is invaluable because a visual dictionary is organized by theme. For example, the herb section in a visual dictionary will have pictures of all the herbs and a translation in two languages.
I highly recommend you get one.
Here are some products to help you learn French.
Random Facts, Culture and Points of Interest
- Tipping: No tipping. All bills, as required by law, must say service compris, which means “tip has been included”. It is not uncommon to leave small change from the bill in a restaurant or café. A few Centimes.
- Driving: People drive on the right side of the road.
- Greeting: French people cheek kiss to greet each others between family and friends.The number of kisses varies between 1 to 5 but typically it’s 2 or 3. Even men cheek kiss. My sons both greet their friends at school this way.( it’s very charming and civilized).
- Châteaux: there are around 40,000 châteaux (castles, manors, palaces) in France.
- Inventions: Famous French inventions include the adding machine, the hot air balloon, the airship, the parachute, the submarine, photography, animation and cinema.
- Cheese: There are over 300 different kinds of cheese made in France
- Famous People: Brigitte Bardot- (actress, model and singer), Claude Monet and Édouard Manet- (French Painters), Christian Dior and Coco Chanel – (fashion designer), Édith Piaf- (Frances greatest popular singer. Daft punk –( French Music Duo) see video below. Too many more to list.
Here’s a video of “Daft Punk”, a French music group.
- National Anthem: “La Marseillaise”, France’s national anthem, was composed in Strasbourg in 1792, not in Marseilles as its name might have you think.
Play the video to hear the French National Anthem
How To Learn About Another Countries Culture.
We as a family were able to adapt to our new home abroad within days of arriving. I attribute this to the simple fact that were were informed and we prepared the kids in advance.
Learning about your future host country just makes common sense. There is no wrong or right way for you to go about learning either. I would start with the internet an go from there.
We took several family vacations to France before. I taught my children to speak French myself from an early age but you don’t have to speak the language to teach it to your kids like i did. You can learn it right alongside with your kids using software and audio tapes. I also prepared the kids by telling them what to expect at their new school. It made all the difference in the world.
How you go about teaching and preparing your kids is going to be unique to you and your kids. As i said, there is no right or wrong way because you know your kids the best and you know how you learn best as well.
HOW TO MOVE ABROAD
If you’re interested in how we made our dream of moving abroad a reality, stay tuned for the “HOW TO MOVE ABROAD” series where I spill the beans. You’ll find out step by step how we did it and how you can do it too, even if you have kids and a mortgage. I’ll leave no stone unturned.
If this is your first time here, you should go read Update: We moved to the south of France.
I hope you enjoyed this inside peak of life abroad from the perspective of an average family trying to get the most out of live.
If you have any questions about moving abroad, I have a new advice column called “ASK ANNIE: Travel Advice”. get expert long term travel and live abroad advice. Ask me any question you want and I will post the answer on this site.
Have you ever experienced culture shock? When you take a trip abroad to live or go on vacation, do you or did you learn about that countries language and culture? Did it help? Do you wish you did prepare? Leave your comments below.
I completely agree. Learning the language can really help get accustomed to being in another country. I can see how it would help you integrate into the country by making you feel less like an outsider and more of a person who belongs there. Plus, for most countries, especially France, they really appreciate when you try to learn the language.
Steve recently posted..The 3 Steps for Turning Plans Into Bold Action
I wish i had this guide before i moved to Paris for university and then subsequently for work LOL
i do miss Paris though. after getting to speak French then it wasn’t all so bad haha
Noch Noch
Noch Noch | be me. be natural. recently posted..today I laughed: how is business done in China?
Hi Annie,
This is my second time here and I enjoy reading your articles about France because I was living for 5 years in Paris. You remind me many things.
Well I don’t really like the cheek kiss that French People give because I find they exaggerate a little bit: I mean when you go to a soirée and you see avery body for the first time in your life you are not supposed to give them a kiss! But I agree with you that these cultural difference are the most important experience you can get when you are living abroad.
Do you actually speak French? If not, do you find French people speaking ENglish? My experience was that French didn’t have a great skill to learn English! But that was a great challenge for me to learn French very quickly! I had to in order to communicate with others!
See you and enjoy your stay in France!
Lenia recently posted..Your Life Your Choices: A Three-Month Review
Hello Lenia,
welcome back. I find that the French especially the younger people do want to speak English. It is taught in school from a very young age. But there are not a lot of people in Marseilles who actually speak english well.
I do speak french fluently. My family ( my father is french Canadian) so the transition for me was not so bad. But my husband and kids are not fluent so they are dealing with the struggles of language and culture barriers.
ps.
I don’t cheek kiss strangers just friends and family.
Hi Annie,
What a great introduction to moving to France! Can´t wait to read all your other tips and tricks.
The culture shock can be really huge as you said. When I first visited Nicaragua I felt totally lost even though I spoke Spanish and went with a group of 15 Dutch people. We thought we were prepared for this culture but boy were we wrong! The only thing we could do was to ask a lot of questions, watch and learn. The first reaction to this shock was to want to go back home but after we started understanding how things work we actually wanted to stay longer.
Concerning the language barrier – you are totally right – teach yourself some basics of the language especially in countries where you can´t expect that people speak English.
To avoid a culture shock and to learn the language I often take a full time language course for 3 weeks which helps me advance a lot in the language I learn. Additionally, in language school they teach you about their culture, everything you need to know about the town you live in and you get to know the first locals.
Ursula recently posted..Why you should move to a different culture!
Ursula,
i’mnot surprised that you would dedicate so much time to learning the language before you go. You have a natural love for other cultures. I wish more people would take the time to just learn some simple phrases.
The culture thing is huge too. I’ve seen Americans leave huge tips at restaurants now knowing that they don’t need to. In Thailand you are not supposed to touch peoples heads. In many asian cultures you don’t leave your chopsticks pointing into the rice bowl. A little research goes a long way.
Hi Annie,
You are so right – the culture thing is huge and you can and will make a lot of mistakes but it helps a lot to observe the locals!
If people don´t do the research upfront they can still show that they want to do the right thing by asking how things work and by apologizing honestly for their mistakes.
Most people will love to help and they often go the extra mile for you.
Ursula recently posted..Why you should move to a different culture!
I have travel overseas and I can understand how hard it can be, the language is the biggest challenge. The food can be a little different. Being an American, I am use to the way American food taste. I got adventurous and shopped an Asian store and the food was too fresh.
Michael Belk recently posted..Planned Parenthood Clinics | Right or Wrong Decision?
Michael,
Asian food is very Fresh and trying different food can be adventurous. It’s like being a child and trying new things for the first time.
It’s interesting to know that you don’t have to leave a tip. I like it much better that way! There’s no pressure to figure out how much to leave. It’s the same in Taipei. The tip is already included at some restaurants. Even when I get a haircut, no need to tip. I don’t like how the US is so dependent on tips. A hotel guy hails you a cab and you’re suppose to tip him? For raising his arm and having a taxi, that’s waiting in line, pull up?
Your intro about culture shock and not knowing the language reminds me of when I went to Taipei to study Chinese. For the first couple weeks, I think I ate food from 7-11 for lunch because I couldn’t order food. I was too scared cause I couldn’t read so I couldn’t order. I just grabbed something. Looking back now I laugh at it cause I couldn’t do something so simple.
Learning French would be pretty cool. Can I move to France and you be my teacher?
Benny recently posted..10 Reasons To Start a Blog Today
Benny,
I can’t picture you being scared to order. The Benny I know, goes all out in a big way.
But i can see how it can happen so easily because culture shock is something people tend to think won’t happen to them. Once it happens, it’s undeniable.
And yes, you can move to France and i’ll be your teacher.
Wow Annie, that was very interesting.
I’ve never really visited a lot of different countries, a few. But I was always with a bunch of people so I never worried about the language barriers. Moving would be a total shock to me.
This is going to be a marvelous series Annie and I’m going to get to live it through your experiences so it doesn’t get much better than that.
I will admit, I love hearing people speak the language. It’s just beautiful, even if they are probably cussing me out! lol… Still sounds cool.
Thanks Annie and I look forward to more of what you have to share with us.
Adrienne recently posted..Is Your WordPress Blog Set Up Properly?
Hello Adrienne,
i’m so glad you enjoyed it. My goal as i said really is to make it interesting for everyone. I love the history channel and i want this series to be a bit like that. Part educational part entertaining?
Please if you have any suggestions let me know. i value your opinion more than you know. Bonsoir.
Annie Andre recently posted..Adventures In Moving: How To Decide Where To Relocate Your Family and Life.
I’m not a history buff but that doesn’t mean that I don’t find things fascinating. I think to me it’s more enjoyable because it’s coming from someone who is experiencing it if that makes sense.
I have no suggestions at all, you are doing a fabulous job. I think more people can relate because like I said, you are living this experience and we just get to see it through your eyes. How cool is that!
I’m going to enjoy this year myself living in France through you!
Wonderful job Annie!
Adrienne recently posted..Is Your WordPress Blog Set Up Properly?
Great primer on moving to France! I love French, learned it as a child while living in Belgium, continued to study it in high school and college. but I’ve lost a lot of it now (it’s not that useful in California where if anyone knows another language it’s Spanish) Great to know how useful it is in Europe!
My daughter also chose French for her language to study and she longs to live in France some day. I will share this with her. Maybe after she finishes college will try living in France for a while – then I can visit.
Another tip in the “tools” category: if you are using a smartphone while abroad you can get language translation apps, and also an app that gives you instant money conversions. I found these so handy while traveling in Thailand last year.
Sarah O recently posted..Nature’s New Beginnings: Groundhog Day, Candlemas And Imbolc.
Hello Sarah,
I think it would be an amazing experience for your daughter to live abroad. Here in France, all of my sons friends long to move to America. It’s a funny thing.
As for your French. I think it will take you no time at all to remember your French. I bet if you spent a month in France it would all come back to you like it was yesterday.
I like your suggestion about smartphone language apps. There are quite a few on the market i haven’t looked into any yet but that does sound like a fantastic resource for would be travellers.
Thanks for the suggestion.
Annie Andre recently posted..How To Increase Your Creativity: Research Shows Living Abroad Can Help
Great idea for a mini series! I look forward to it unfolding! As for. France, I’m excited for all the kisses!
Okay okay, but truly, I had no idea French was such a highly spoken and learned language! I’m in a bit of a Francophilia stage right now, so I am determined to learn me some French!
Thank you david. There are so many things to write about. Liket he fact that i can’t find a taqaria or descent.
Be careful David, once a Francophile always a Francophile. Interesting enough, there are quite a few anglophiles in France.
French is very useful for traveling especially through Europe. You will find that someone usually will speak french before they speak English. If you speak both french and English than you will have no problem getting around and communicating.